Katherine youre welcome
by otakuinananime
Summary: A parody of my immortal as a christmas present to a friend, its not that deep


Chapter 1.

AN: Special fangz (get it, coz Im goffik) 2 my gf (ew not in that way) Katherine, myimmortaltranscript 4 helpin me wif da story and spelling. U rok! Anaya ur da bane of my deprzzing existence u rok 2! MCU ROX!

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Hi my name is Katherine Dark'ness Dementia Mason and I have short black hair (that's not how I got my name) with shaved sides and black tips that stay away from my mid-back and chocolate brown eyes like beautiful shit and a lot of people tell me I look like Amy Lee (AN: if u don't know who she is, that's okay cause I look nothing like her). I'm not related to Chris Hemsworth but I wish I was because he's a major fucking hottie. I'm not a vampire and my teeth are straight and white. I have pale white skin (JK I'M BLACK). I'm also not a witch, and I go to a magic school called Hogwarts in England where I'm in the seventh year (I'm twenty-three). I'm a nerd (in case you couldn't tell) and I wear mostly Jackets. I love Hot Topic and I buy all my clothes from there. For example today I was wearing an orange jacket with Litten on it and blue jeans, pink fishnets (Which no one could see under my jeans) and shoes. I was wearing no lipstick, white foundation (AGAIN, NO, I'M BLACK), no eyeliner and no eye shadow. I was walking outside Hogwarts. It was snowing and raining so there was no sun, which I was very happy about. A lot of preps stared at me. I avoided them and went about my day.

"Hey Katherine!" shouted a voice. I looked up. It was…. Draco Malfoy!

"What's up, ya dickhead?" I asked.

"Nothing." he said shyly.

But then, I heard my friends call me and I had to go away.

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AN: IS it good? PLZ tell me fangz!

Chapter 2.

AN: Fangz 2 myimmortaltranscript 4 helpin me wif da chapta! BTW Katherine stop flaming ma story ok!

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The next day I woke up in my bedroom. It was snowing and raining again. I opened the door of my bedroom and drank some water from a bottle I had. My bed was blue and on it was pillows that didn't have black lace on the ends. I got out of my bed and took off my giant MCU t-shirt which I used for pajamas. Instead, I put on a blue petsmart shirt, a marvel lanyard, shoes and black fishnets on (again, under my jeans). I put on one pair of earrings in my pierced ears, and couldn't put my hair in a kind of messy bun cause it's not long enough.

My friend, Lilith (AN: Anaya dis is u!) woke up then and scowled at me. She flipped her shoulder-length brown hair with no streaks and opened her demonic, soul stealing eyes. She put on her child satanic ritual t-shirt with jeans, and shoes. She concealed her weapon, and then she put on her makeup (lipstick and whatever else she puts on her face.)

"OMFG SLUT, I saw you talking to Draco Malfoy yesterday!" she said in a fake valley girl voice..

"Yeah? So?" I said.

"Do you want to kill Draco?" she asked as we went out of the Slytherin common room and into the Great Hall.

"No I so fucking don't!" I shouted.

"Yeah right!" she exclaimed. Just then, Draco walked up to me.

"Hi." he said.

"Hi." I replied exasperated.

"Guess what." he said.

"Do I have to?" I asked.

"Annapantsu is having a concert in Hogsmeade." he told me.

"Oh. My. Fucking. God!" I screamed. I love AP. She's my favorite singer, besides many other singers.

"Well…. do you want to go with me?" he asked.

I gasped. Oh nooooo.

Chapter 3.

AN: STOP FLAMMING DA STORY PREPZ OK! odderwize fangs 2 da goffik ppl 4 da good reveiws! FANGS AGEN RAVEN! oh yeah, BTW I don't own dis or da lyrics 4 Good Chralotte.

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On the night of the concert I put on my shoes. Underneath them were ripped red fishnets, as per usual. Then I put on a black jacket. I put on matching fishnet on my arms (I was feeling spicy). I looked at my hair and didn't do anything to it. I felt a little depressed then, so I talked to the author of this story, Kali, cause she's the light of my life. I read a mpreg fanfic while I waited for her to stop talking and I listened to some annapanantsu. I definitely did not paint my nails black and put on TONS of black eyeliner. Then I didn't put on some black lipstick. I didn't put on foundation because I was pale anyway (I AM BLACK). I drank some angry orchard so I was ready to go to the concert.

I went outside. Lilith was waiting there in front of her flying car. She was wearing a very stylish t-shirt (as she does), a very stylish skirt, and a little eyeliner (AN: A lot of kewl grlz wer it ok!).

"Hi Lilith!" I said in a depressed voice.

"Slut." she said back. We walked into her flying black Mercedes-Benz (the license plate said 666) and flew to the place with the concert. On the way we talked about that time when Lilith punched Draco in the nuts and stole his concert tickets. We both don't smoke cigarettes or do drugs. When we got there, we both hopped out of the car. We went to the mosh pit at the front of the stage and jumped up and down as we listened to Annanapantsuna.

"I know you, I walked with you once upon a dream,

I know you, that gleam in your eyes is so familiar a gleam." She sang (I don't own da lyrics 2 dat song).

"She is so fucking hot." I said to Lilith, pointing to her as she sung, filling the club with her amazing voice.

Suddenly Lilith looked bored.

"What's wrong?" I asked as we moshed to the music. Then I caught on.

"Hey, a guy hit on you at work today didn't he" I said.

"PEOPLE ARE GROSS AND NEED TO LEAVE ME ALONE" said Lilith angrily and started ranting and groaning as she has every right to do, bless her little asexual heart.

"I'm hungry " I said. "Let's go eat food and not talk about politics." I said disgustedly, thinking of his ugly blonde toupee.

The night went on really well, and I had a great time. So did Lilith. After the concert, we drank some blueberry vodka and asked annnapatsnuur for her autograph. We got concert tees. Lilith and I crawled back into the Mercedes-Benz, because how else do you get in a car, but Lilith didn't go back into Hogwarts, instead she drove the car into… the Forbidden Forest!

Chapter 4.

AN: I sed stup flaming ok Katherine's name is KATHERINE nut mary su OK! LILITH IS A DRAGON!

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"BITCH!" I shouted. "What the fuck do you think you are doing?"

Lilith didn't answer but she stopped the flying car and he walked out of it. I walked out of it too, curiously.

"What the fucking hell?" I asked angrily.

"Katherine?" she asked.

"What?" I snapped.

"We're at racetrack calm down" she said.

She was right. We walked in to get slurpees.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING YOU MOTHERFUKERS!"

It was….Dumbledore!

We ignored him and went about our business.

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AN: STOP flaming! if u flam it menz ur a prep or a posr! Da only reson Dumbledeor swor is coz he had a hedache ok an on tup of dat he wuz mad at dem 4 having slurpees! PS im nut updating umtil I get five good revoiws!

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